Houston, we have a pronoun.

Ok, so first off - we suck at blogging. There, I said it and everyone knows admitting you have a problem is the first step.

Now the big stuff - as of last Tuesday, Flash is a girl. Actually, she has been a her for about 19 weeks, (Holy crap, yep we are in the 22nd week) but she gave us a great "diaper shot" that let us verify it.

We put together a little video as a way of telling our families and such, so here is the link to that. You will want to have the sound up to get the full effect.

Here are a few other fun pictures from that day....

Next on the big stuff agenda, the reason we have been so sucky at blogging. Most of the time - especially since school has started - we try to blog on the weekends. It's just that our weekends have been pretty crazy lately with attending open houses each of the past three Sundays. We currently live about 25 minutes from my school in a small town that was about 25 minutes away from LB's job in another small town. Last May, she got a job in the same town my school is in so we have been planning on trying to move since then. In the middle of October, we met with a realtor and on Halloween we got pre-approved for a loan. Ah! So the past few weeks - on top of all the crazy baby stuff - we have been about waist-deep in house hunting. We have had to adjust and readjust our thoughts about location, size, amenities (like basement, 2-car garage, etc.) but I feel like we are in a really good place as far as knowing what we can afford and like and want. We meet with the realtor again tomorrow to view a few more houses that haven't been on the open house tour we've been on.

Needless to say, nearly every waking hour since Halloween has been filled with searches and online photos, decisions and dreams. It seems so strange to be thinking about moving - especially when I'll be about the size of a small country when we actually get to the moving date - but exciting and terrifying all at the same time. I think we have decided to do all these huge, scary things all at the same time so we don't have to do them again for a few years and we can have the normal, boring, life-with-a-newborn/toddler time without worrying about moving or anything. Ha!

Anyway, that's the quick version of the three or four week hiatus we've been on. W promise to try to do much better with keeping up in the future!

SN and LB

By SN

Monthly Questions 4

First up, the monthly check-in questions (by SN)
 
Foods that are making me queasy:

Nothing much, really sugary sweet things if any thing

Foods that I am craving:

Vinegar, pickles, olives, meat, Kentucky Fried Chicken

Strangest snack:

Miracle Whip on roast and noodles

How I am feeling physically:

Pretty good, I really only get tired during the evening but as long as I keep moving, I’m good. Once I sit down, it’s over.

How I am feeling emotionally:

More weepy, up and down, all over the place

Sensory over-load:

Touch – everything feels like it’s stretching (probably because it is, I know) and I just cannot get comfortable (which I am sure will only get worse)

What we're excited about:

The baby can hear – or is getting ready to be able to – so we’re excited to be able to talk to him or her.

What we're nervous about:

This all seems to be going really fast – it’s already the middle of October!

If I could be granted 3 wishes:

1. A pronoun

2. A good home for some kitties

3. Better sleep – LB has been practicing the get-up-for-an-hour-in-the-middle-of-the-night and I am having some CRAZY dreams (and they haven’t all been good)

 

Now the fun ones:

When I wore my first maternity outfit

Saturday, October 6, 2012. I know it was this day because we went to see LB's mom and do a little shopping at the thrift stores in KC.

Finding out gender

We thought we might be able to this week, but alas the child would not cooperate. So we will wait until November and see if he or she is a bit less modest. I say that if we can't see then, we just not find out at all. LB isn't so keen on that idea.

Things I did that were out of character

Bought three dresses. Looked at (and probably will buy) tights. Pulled up 'hair and beauty' category on Pinterest. Ate grapes for my snack (especially out of character since LB was eating corn chips for her snack at the same time.) Park as far away from the building (especially at school) as possible.

Predictions people made about gender

I'd say it is about 50/50 girl vs. boy.

How I feel about getting bigger

Since I lost three pounds this past month - and yes, it is fine for me to do that - I am feeling much better about my little belly.

Project nursery

We have been throwing around the idea of doing light gray walls, either white or dark wood furniture, and then bright, primary colors for the sheets and bumper and stuff.

How I feel about people touching my belly

I wouldn't have known how to answer this question three days ago. But then one of my students - a dear, sweet boy who is glad to have both of his hands still - came up to me in the hall and put his hand on my belly and said something along the lines of "Awwww, look, your little belly is sticking out." Like I said, he is glad that 1) I like him and 2) he still has both of his hands. :)

Schrödinger Revisited

By LB

 

We didn’t have cooperation from Flash on the self-revealing poses yesterday. We realized that we have a new "cat in a box" which is that our child is either a boy or a girl and we can't know which it is until we make an observation, essentially making it both girl and boy at the same time. Okay, enough with the nerdiness. The next appointment is in a month and we’ll have a big ultrasound (with an actual ultrasound technician) where they will measure everything and make sure everything is growing normally. But we did get another chance to see that beautiful beating heart and those wiggling arms and legs. And they are much longer legs than they were last time we saw them!

 

I've been trying to find the best way to express this thought but nothing seems to be coming together too eloquently so I'm just going to write down my thoughts. And it's probably easier if I just state bluntly what I mean rather than trying to be polite and use innuendo and context to express my meaning. So bear with me.

 

It seems unimaginable to me that this baby is here because of a vial of sperm, a doctor, and a medical procedure. It feels like such a part of me that at times I have to remind myself that SN is not pregnant because I got her pregnant. It was not a private, passionate moment between the two of us that created our Little Flash. He or she is not physically mine, but is mine in so many other ways already that I can't imagine that I wasn’t an integral part of the creation of him or her.

Hopefully that makes some sense. We’re working on a month 4 update so check back soon!

Pregnancy brain, round ligament pain, and lightening crotch; Oh my!

By SN

Disclaimer: This is probably the first (of many.....well, at least a few, I'm guessing) post that might be a bit too 'up close and personal' for some readers. Feel free to skip this one - at least towards the end (and I'll give you a warning) - if you think you are one those readers.


This week a few of my favorite friends made their reappearance. After feeling phenomenal last week - I mean, I didn't take a nap for a week and a half - my dear companion on this journey, fatigue, dropped by again (and, may I say, overstayed his welcome.) In addition, he brought along nausea and lack of appetite as well. The most welcome (hear the sarcasm here?) return guest has been pregnancy brain. The following are a few of the more memorable instances in which my brain had apparently left my body.

Exhibit A: We were going over to eat supper with one of my co-workers and his wife Saturday night. They made lasagna and we were to bring the garlic bread. So, we get around and head out the door and LB just stops in the door way. I had gone to the kitchen to take a glass or something and I couldn't go out the door because she was just standing there, staring at me. Finally (and I'll admit I was the slightest bit grumpy about it) I asked if she was going to move or what and she said two simple words, "Garlic bread." Oooops.

Exhibit B: I saw on Facebook that one of my other co-workers' wife was due on October 17th - the date of our next doctor's appointment (and hopefully, when we find out what pronouns to use for Little Flash) - and I told LB because I thought it was neat. She - about 2 minutes later - asked me, "It's their second, right?" I had to ask her about 12 times what she said and finally was like, "I have no idea what you are talking about" before she had to remind me about our conversation about my co-worker. Wooooow

Exhibit C: (I saved the best for last) Sunday morning, LB woke up with a stomach ache and a headache. So, being the wonderful wife I am, asked her if she needed anything. She thought some coffee sounded good, so I went to go make it. I got the water (the filtered stuff since we got a new coffee pot recently), four scoops of coffee (since we're making less because I'm not drinking it anymore), and pushed the button. A few minutes later, she got up to go get a cup and found a hot pot of..... wait for it...... clean, clear water. I seemed to have forgotten the essential step of pouring the water into the coffee maker. Epic pregnant wife fail.

In addition to all our old pals, some new friends dropped in to introduce themselves. First there is round ligament pain, whom I can deal with ok by watching how I move (no quick, jerky, twisting movements) and bracing myself when I sneeze.

With all the company we've had around here, it's amazing that we're still super excited - especially for the 17th - and totally loving this entire journey.


**Warning: potential TMI ahead**

The real fun has been what pregnant ladies the world over affectionately refer to as "lightening crotch." That wonderful and surprising feeling of being kicked in the cervix. Now I realize that Flash is probably too little to be kicking with much velocity and that I can't register even the ones he or she does land, but there really isn't too much of a better way to describe it (that is, unless you can imagine a what a sharp stick to the hoo-haw feels like.) I do have to say that I have been fairly fortunate as most of the strikes have occurred at home in the evening, luckily not in the middle of a lecture on say, oh, resolution of force vectors into their components.

A second, yet equally as fun, TMI visitor is what I've been calling "lightening boob." It is basically the same sort of stabbing, flaming, exploding wonderfulness as lightening crotch, just in a different anatomical area. That has actually been around for a few weeks as I remember vividly calling my sister (who has a two-year old) one evening about a month ago asking if my breast was supposed to feel like it was shooting flames - the answer, if I heard correctly through all the laughter, was that yes, that can tend to happen (in case you were wondering like I was.)

Monthly Questions 3 (a week late - see a trend?)

First up, the monthly check-in questions (by SN)

Foods that are making me queasy:
            Cereal

Foods that I am craving:
            Apple juice, fruit, meat

Strangest snack:
            Nothing too unusual this month

How I am feeling physically:
            Not nearly as tired but my ab muscles feel like I’ve been doing 200 crunches

How I am feeling emotionally:
            Mostly pretty excited but somewhat worried and overwhelmed

Sensory over-load:
            Smells still

What we're excited about:
            Finding out if it’s a girl or boy

What we're nervous about:
            Moving, money… the normal things

If I could be granted 3 wishes:

1.      Win the lottery

2.      Find the perfect house, have enough money for it, and be moved in and settled without worry (wait, is that three in one?)

3.      The ability to take a nap and get things accomplished at the same time (that’s really LB’s wish)

Now the rest:

Celebrating the end of 1st trimester

We sort of celebrated this weekend by going to a corn maze. I guess that’s about the extent of celebration – well, that and not being buried in laundry and dishes since I’ve gotten my energy back and can actually help around the house.

When I wore my first maternity outfit

I work my first maternity pants a few weeks ago. I had been doing the whole “rubber band” thing, but then tried the maternity pants. Once you go there, you don’t go back! I have not, however, worn a maternity shirt yet.

How I feel about getting bigger

I’m feeling pretty ok. I always gain weight at the end of the summer so when I was 10ish pounds heavier at the first pre-natal appointment than I had been at the regular check-up in March, I sort of freaked out. But at the last one, I had only gained 3 pounds so I’m ok with that. The worst part is not fitting into anything I own anymore – or getting there quickly – and having just given away (within the last six months or so) all my “big” clothes because I hadn’t been wearing them.

Finding out gender

We are going to find out – hopefully at the next appointment in October – because 1) I don’t think LB could look at the ultrasound and not be able to tell and 2) it will be so much easier to shop – not necessarily for us, but for the grandmas and aunties! J

 

 

This baby is going to be brined.

By SN

While we were eating lunch at Cracker Barrel this afternoon, I ordered my regular turnip greens with vinegar. As I was (quite thoroughly, thank you very much) enjoying them - ok, ok, and maybe drinking the wonderful juice left at the end - I thought about all the foods I've really been enjoying the last few weeks and how they reflected on my German heritage. Besides the greens and vinegar, I have savored quite a few not-so-sweet (or at least semi-sour) things. For a while, the only thing I could drink was orange juice - I know, that's sweet but it's also sour and tangy, cranberry juice (the real juice not that cocktail stuff) and more than a few McAlister's pickles - minus the rind because it was gross.

So in the middle of my pondering, the following quote came out of my mouth. "This baby isn't going to have soaked in amniotic fluid for nine months, it's going to come out brined." To which LB replied, "Blog title?"

At least we're having some fun with all this, right?!?

Speaking of fun, the last few days have been a blast. We had our second doctor's appointment Wednesday and got to see Flash's flutter again (see: Flash's flutter, the sequel) and his or her gymnastics's abilities (Olympics 3032?.) Additionally, we could see fingers and arms and brain (two hemispheres!) and skull and spine. I have to admit that I was so enthralled by watching that little flutter that I sort of forgot to look to see if there were legs and toes, but LB assures me that there were. I also sort of figure that since no one in the room said something like, "Oh my goodness, where are the baby's legs?" that they were there.

We had decided a while ago that we were going to try to wait to tell "everyone" until after our 11-12 week appointment. So once everything looked good - actually, "perfect" according to our nurse, but who's bragging? - we went back to school to let the cat out of the bag. The amazing woman who is my school's book-keeper/money magic lady had known that we were pregnant since the day we found out (basically) and was so ready to tell people. She was so cute because she went flying into the other office with the attendance secretaries and assistant principles and just started running around to everyone telling them.

That night we went "facebook official" and the response has been amazing. I'm up to 96 likes on my picture and I think 40 comments or so. LB has about half (which is good because she is a lot more picky about her friends and only has about half the number I do) and my mom and sisters are right behind her. It has been fairly interesting who has and who has not commented or anything. I guess somewhere inside, I knew not everyone would be terribly excited (you know, since we're not a "real" family or something like that) but it does irk me a little that people can't be at least nice about it. LB then noted that maybe those people were just following the "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all" mode of operation. My main thought on all of that is that if they don't want to be a part of this amazing and wonderful journey and don't want to know our awesome little Flash, then I don't want them anyway. Plus, that just means we don't have to share him or her with as many people and that means more baby cuddling for us! :)

Thursday and Friday at school and Saturday and Sunday at church (I get to drive our church's golf cart/shuttle sometimes and Saturday was one of those) were so much fun! It's sort of been this roller coaster of us being so excited in July, but not being able to tell too many people, to it sort of being just a normal thing until the middle of August when we told our families. Then, because they were so excited, it was exciting again for us - or at least a new exciting or something. Then we got into the school routine (and I wasn't feeling great - more on that in a bit) and it sort of waned again. Now, in the last four or five days, it's been through-the-roof exciting again with all these new people getting in on the excitement and being able to talk about it and share it. In fact, I think my cheeks hurt from smiling so much for the last few days. I know there will be a dip again as everyone adjusts and the "new" wears off, but then it's finding out the sex - hopefully in October or November - and then the holidays, hopefully (if it's in the cards and everything works out) moving after the first of the year and then, (holy capes, Batman!) little Flash will be joining us.

I know that they will (because that's how life goes) but I hope the next six months don't fly by so fast that we forget to enjoy them. I think that's the biggest thing I'm worried/anxious/thinking about lately - enjoying this trip as we take it and not getting too far ahead of ourselves. The next hill on the roller coaster will be there when we get there so my hope is that we just enjoy this moment and not miss it for trying to prepare for the next drop.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot to put up our new pictures. Here you go!

Measuring 4.48 cm (about 1.75 inches) and right on track for March 31st.
If you look really close, you can see a few of those cute little fingers
on the bottom hand.



Although this one is a little monkey-ish, the dark spots in the head
are actually the two hemispheres of the brain. I like how Flash is all
"Hey there, what's up?" with his or her little left hand raised.

Flash Is Now A Fetus

By SN

After ten weeks, which we were through as of yesterday, the embryo is no longer depending on the yolk sac for nutrition but is instead being supplied by the placenta. Basically, that means I officially have a parasite.

       

Along with his or her definition change, Little Flash has begun to assert his or her "being-hood." The most notable of these assertions is that he or she is no longer content being squeezed into my regular pants. This became quite obvious Sunday. I had worn some cheap, yoga-style maternity pants to go to school and work on Saturday morning and just left them on all day. They were really comfy, but they were yoga pants - hello? Sunday I decided to try my one (and to the point only) pair of "real" maternity pant -dark jeans - at church. You know, a test run. I knew my others were getting tight and I had been doing the whole rubber band through the button hole thing last week so I wanted to try to go to the mall and get a belly band. For those who don't know, it is basically a tube top that you wear over your belly to help hold up your pants that you can't fasten anymore. Target didn't have my size - Grrrrrr - so we had to go the real maternity clothes store.

When we got there, they were having a sale on jeans so I thought I'd just look and try some on. I found one pair that were pretty cheap and fit really well (with room to grow!) Since they were buy one get one half off, it seemed silly not to get another pair - especially since I can wear jeans everyday if I want/need. Before I looked for those, however, I did really want to get a belly band. So on went my old pants and O.M.G! What had been slightly snug through the fly and needing a rubber band around the button were no longer going to even begin to think about zipping. I was shocked. I simply could not believe the difference. It was like once Flash got some legroom, he or she was not about to go back to being squished into anything else. Luckily, with the belly band (and the rubber band) I think I can wear them a few more ........ weeks? days? hours?

 Then came the moment. That "this is too close to home, freak-out, hyperventilate slightly" moment. They have these wonderful pillows at the maternity clothes store that you can strap on your belly to try on clothes to see how they will look and fit when you are bigger. Out of curiosity (and I'll admit now, stupidity) I thought I'd just slide that thing under the flap of my new jeans and try her out. I didn't even get a look in the mirror before I was literally stripping it off in the middle of the store. I looked down, saw this bump sticking out of my non-maternity shirt that I have had for years, and suddenly couldn't breathe.

 From what I can recall (and some is blurry due to lack of oxygen) the following thoughts ran through my head, "Holy Batman (ok, ok, it was probably a little racier than that, but we'll keep it clean)! This is sort of really happening and I'm going to look like that and there's a real little person in there growing and making me look like that. And O.M.G. they are going to come out of there and then we have to keep him or her alive and clothed and fed. And crap, they are going to need a bed and a room and some stuff. And crackers, (again, trying to keep it clean) they a probably going to want to go to college and drive a car and do sports or dance or band or something. And I can't hardly stay awake a whole day now so how am I ever going to be able to do all that and not sleep. And, wait a minute, haven't we been talking about having more!?"

 It was at that point that I realized I was ripping the belly pillow off and LB was laughing. I began to breathe again and some of the hysteria left. I think that it was worse because I had (finally) read the part of What to Expect about labor. I have sort of been putting off thinking about that part of the whole deal but LB convinced me that it was the unknown I was worried about so the earlier I read about it, the more time I had to get over any freaking out and to ask questions. So Saturday night, I sat down and read the whole labor part. I really didn't freak out too much - which was surprising - but I think some of that came out Sunday in the maternity store.

 I was going to write today about how amazing I have been feeling the last couple of days (I attribute it to not being smashed into my regular pants.) Until Flash decided to assert some more personhood today. I was going to be so very productive on my day off. I had a list and I was going to get it all done. Then Flash decided that we needed a nap. So, ok, not a big deal I'll take a nap. Five hours later, it's 2:30 and I haven't eaten or done a blasted thing. Ok, so I have like 6 hours before LB is going to be home - plenty of time. Go eat some lunch, and then - no, Flash I can't take another nap! Your mama is going to be really upset if I don't get some things done. Ok, well maybe another short one. And here we are - 6:30, only one thing on the list done, LB is home, and she is warming supper. Wife fail. :(